Annoyance galore! · Mind takes over

Why I’m angry all the time

I don’t like being angry. It makes me lose control and see stars and also I end up wasting a lot of energy. But nowadays, there seem to be things that make me feel like an old man shouting at the neighbourhood kids who keep throwing their ball into my garden – except that I’m a 23-year old woman shouting at the entire world for the way society and people keep treating women (bear in mind, the term ‘women’ includes people who identify as a woman as well). Shaking my fists in anger because people cannot see the gross injustices committed by certain sections of society towards other sections of society (here I’m not just talking about women) and how some people can be utterly blind and dumb to the injustices of this world.

To be clear, this post, or rant (let’s just call it what it is) isn’t just about women but a whole lot of it will be about it so if you’re going to start making snide comments about how there are many issues that are just more important than the issue of equality of men and women, I suggest you stop reading right now and go no further.

First up, here’s one thing I’ve been dying to say – feminism isn’t just about giving women equal rights, it’s about treating both genders equally. This means not stereotyping both genders according to what society believes are their roles. A man wants to cry, fine, don’t call him a pussy. A woman is naturally bossy and dominating, fine, don’t call her a bitch. A man has suffered sexual abuse and is deeply troubled, don’t ever dismiss his claims by saying ‘how can a man be raped?’. A woman gets annoyed and starts ranting about the status quo, definitely don’t tell her to shut the fuck up.

Now the question comes – am I a feminist? You’re goddamn right I am and as fierce as they come. I believe that women are extremely disadvantaged and while there has been progress in certain areas, equality is still lacking for women in society. At the same time, I also believe that in certain aspects of society that aren’t fair to men as well. It’s not a question of which is the bigger wrong that needs correcting. There are many wrongs that need correcting and everything can be done at the same time. It’s just a question of whether you want to do it.

I’ve never had a problem with expressing my opinion (my teachers, friends and family can attest to that) but I seem to get enraged every time someone tries to explain to me why I need to calm down when I’m talking about equal rights. Then come the usual crap – feminazi, why don’t you want men also to progress, don’t women already have enough and all the stupid and idiotic sexist jokes. Newsflash – feminism isn’t just about women, you idiots. It’s about creating an equal society where opportunities are provided to you irrespective of which gender you identify with. It’s about treating people equally whether they are men or women or cis or transgender or asexual or pansexual or any other sexuality. It’s about merit and removing stereotypes and achieving what can come as close to an equal society as humanly possible.

I’ve screamed my voice hoarse with friends and coworkers, I’ve been brushed aside by jokes and raised eyebrows when I start to lose control and spew enraged words that don’t make sense to people except me, I’ve also gotten frustrated and tired every time I read an article that talks about how women should not ask for more than they’ve already got considering we weren’t even allowed to vote over 200 years ago. The thing is – it’s not fucking enough and it will never be unless it goes from ‘being a man’s world’ to ‘being a world’.

I’m sick and tired of misconceptions and fear stopping people from speaking out against women being denied equal rights. I’m also sick and tired of ignorance being a major factor in people praising special ads and campaigns that advocate for equality for women on International Women’s Day (ergo, the rant) but continue to treat their female coworkers, mothers, daughters, sisters and wives or fuck that, generally every girl and woman they meet like they’re second-class citizens. You talk the talk, you better fucking walk the walk, buddy.

“But not all men, right?” Haha! Wonderful! So you’ve read the entire rant and yet managed to ignore the crucial point – this isn’t just about women against men, this is about women against the entire society that is intent on bringing them down. It’s all great when male celebrities or even the men in your life stand up and call themselves feminists but when those of your own gender don’t even acknowledge that there’s a problem, ignorance definitely isn’t bliss. It’s not about giving special treatment to half of the population on the planet. The allowances need to be made because for eons, women have been denied everything that men have gotten easily.

Ultimately it’s about deciding whether you can deny a person a chance to experience something, an opportunity to accomplish something, simply because of the gender they identify with or because of the colour of their skin or their sexuality or even religion and nationality. Who gives you the right to decide who gets to do what based on these parameters? Newsflash – what goes around, comes around and it might just come back to bite you in the ass someday. Just saying.


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